...the coffee table in the galley flips over, not once but twice. Leave it on its side, and put it out of its misery
...EVERYTHING dives off of the starboard (right) side of the shelves--including the microwave! Latched cabinet doors open by themselves! (I would take a picture, but I can't move)
...Pearl, the sailor cat, needs comforting down below in the bunk. Linda would LOVE to do that...except she would have to go down the steps--which would be like doing doube-dutch jump rope backwards. think about it
...Linda keeps trying to put the wave action into words so landlubbers can understand how it feels to be on a moving ocean. Words like tilt-a-whirl and demonic swing set come to mind.
...Linda insists on putting on the 'good' life jackets, you know the ones that inflate automatically when you hit the water. Oh, if it doesn't inflate, here is a yellow tab to pull. Once it inflates, look--there is a whistle you can blow. Let's see...my husband can't hear high pitches face to face--how the H*** is he going to hear a whistle on the Gulf of Mexico?!?
...Linda also insists on attaching tethers to the life jacket and the life lines on the boat. This way, if one more of those REALLY big waves hits us, we won't be washed out of the boat completely. Linda asks the big question..."Just how far over the side of the boat will I be dangling? And what do I do then?" Oh look.....you pull yet another thing that releases you from the life line. Linda says "I'll be DEAD." To which Barry calmly replies..."You won't be dead."
...Linda remembers telling Kak and Jerry just last week that if something awful happened while she was on the boat...she has had a good life. While staring down bigger than expected waves, Linda has the sudden realization that she does NOT want to be washed overboard, into cold water, wearing 2 pair of pants, boat shoes, 2 shirts, 2 jackets, and a partridge in a pear tree. This is NOT how she wants to go!! (And you thought it was WARM out here in the Gulf...hah)
...For women only: Taking a pee is a matter of first bracing yourself so you can pull down the elastic waisted pants (worn intentionally--do you know how hard it is to unbutton and unzip pants when you are on a rolling boat in a teeny bathroom??) and then positioning oneself over the toilet bowl at just the right spot, during just the right wave action. I am training my bladder to HOLD IT
...Barry keeps suggesting that Linda eat something. Hmmm, crackers sound good. But she can't imagine getting an eating utensil to move successfully into a bowl of HOT food, that keeps moving up and down, side to side.
...Linda says: "This is the LAST passage I will do." You know it's rough
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